Episode VII (If it sucks we murder J.J. Abrams)

This week’s featured image is a testament to the dickishness of cats as a species. This new contributor, who ironically answers to the name Kitty, was minding her own business, playing Words With Friends whilst performing her morning abolitions(C'mon we all do it!), when a feral feline attacked, knocking the phone from the human’s hand and snapping this intriguing image.  

 

Kitty is now taking donations to seek treatment for emotional damages sustained during this brutal attack 

Our next contributor, the lovable John Brown, wished to let the ladies know he’s single! He’s got a stable job and a car, ladies! John likes long walks on the beach, sunsets, and the occasional satanic blood orgy. 

This cuddly, blue-eyed devil would never, ever chop you up and deposit your remains in a deep freeze at a local storage facility... he promises.

 Sometimes a contributor is just too nervous to light and compose their shot correctly. Case in point, this week, our beloved editor found himself in a bit of weird situation when a man on the street offered to trade him a half-eaten ziplock bag of scrambled eggs for his super cool hat. 

Unwilling to part with his signature headpiece, and mildly fearful for his life and sanity, our intrepid leader demonstrated his cool-headed journalistic prowess by snapping this selfie of the uncomfortable interaction. 

 

The Awkward Selfie Blog staff would like to thank this week’s guest contributors, John Brown (@Johnbrownjoker) and Kitty, just Kitty (@mw_kitty). You can find them bumming around the Colorado Springs and Pueblo, Colorado, comedy scenes. Support local comedy and art by coming out to here them tell jokes some time. 

Help us in our mission to eradicate un-ironic selfies! Next time you find yourself in the midst of a fierce nerf gun battle, running with the bulls, or fleeing from the police, snap a selfie; then send it our way.  by sending your Awkward Selfie Submissions to jokermusicblog@gmail.com or tweeting them to @drewjokerIngram with the hash-tag #AwkwardSelfie.

The Return of the Awkward Selfie!

After a prolonged hiatus The Awkward Selfie Blog is back with a vengeance!

Sadly, as you can see the editor of our esteemed publication has been going through a bit of an existential crisis.

(I spent the past 6 months communing with nature, by which i mean wondering lost in the forest battling exposure)

Thankfully our fearless leader recently emerged from his daze, sold his hermit cave and rejoined society!

Please support this fragile man’s recovery by sending your own awkward selfie submissions to jokermusicblog@gmail.com.

The 5th blog of Awkward Selfies: dedicated to those affected by "Super Bowl Sunday"

As the title would indicate, this edition of the ASB is all about Super Bowl XLVIIII, a tragedy that will go down in history as one of the most awkward moments in sports history.

Our first submitter, Third Culture Eddie, Was very excited to watch the Football Game, he even donned his favorite team’s jersey. Unfortunately, as is the case with most children raised in third world countries, Eddie mistakenly thought football was a game played with shin guards and a round, pentagon spotted ball.

Helmets are for wussies! Viva Ecuador!

Next we have your humble narrator’s photo. Unfortunately the poor bastard is a Bronco’s fan. A mixture of shame and Vodka/Orange Juice led to this extremely awkward selfie opportunity.

I may be pathetic, but nobody can deny that I’m dedicated 

Finally we have a brand new category Here at the Awkward Selfie Blog: The Celebrity Selfie!

The Cast of Full House and Rihanna snapped this gem on the set of Good Morning America and since the Full House guys did a Super Bowl commercial there is a vague sort of tie in to today’s topic.

We were worried about Copyright infringement, but our legal department assures us those laws only apply to sites with actual traffic.

So there it is folks. If you are thinking to yourself, “I could have taken way better photos then those!” Then we challenge you to do it! Send your Awkward Selfie Submissions to Jokermusicblog@gmail.com. 

ASB the Fourth: In which we learn that some reflective surfaces are not conducive to selfies

They say there is nothing better then the love of a good woman. They also say Dog is man's best friends. Well as our new contributor, Baldy, has discovered, proverbs don’t always apply in combination with one another.

You might call this an onslaught of affection.

Everybody loves a balloon, but, as these submitters, Army buddies I’m nicknaming Los Tres Amigos del Fuego, learned they do not make very flattering mirrors. Honestly though ladies they are all very attractive and virile young men in real life. Especially the one with the camera, he’s a straight up stud.

(I'm the one with the camera!)

Great people of the Internet, I present you with a challenge: Join me in this project, by sending in your own Awkward Selfie Submissions (ASS). It's fun, I promise. Send your ASS’ with a brief description to jokermusicblog@gmail.com. If our staff… meaning me, thinks your selfie is funny enough for the blog, you can expect to become Internet-famous in no time!