Episode VII (If it sucks we murder J.J. Abrams)

This week’s featured image is a testament to the dickishness of cats as a species. This new contributor, who ironically answers to the name Kitty, was minding her own business, playing Words With Friends whilst performing her morning abolitions(C'mon we all do it!), when a feral feline attacked, knocking the phone from the human’s hand and snapping this intriguing image.  

 

Kitty is now taking donations to seek treatment for emotional damages sustained during this brutal attack 

Our next contributor, the lovable John Brown, wished to let the ladies know he’s single! He’s got a stable job and a car, ladies! John likes long walks on the beach, sunsets, and the occasional satanic blood orgy. 

This cuddly, blue-eyed devil would never, ever chop you up and deposit your remains in a deep freeze at a local storage facility... he promises.

 Sometimes a contributor is just too nervous to light and compose their shot correctly. Case in point, this week, our beloved editor found himself in a bit of weird situation when a man on the street offered to trade him a half-eaten ziplock bag of scrambled eggs for his super cool hat. 

Unwilling to part with his signature headpiece, and mildly fearful for his life and sanity, our intrepid leader demonstrated his cool-headed journalistic prowess by snapping this selfie of the uncomfortable interaction. 

 

The Awkward Selfie Blog staff would like to thank this week’s guest contributors, John Brown (@Johnbrownjoker) and Kitty, just Kitty (@mw_kitty). You can find them bumming around the Colorado Springs and Pueblo, Colorado, comedy scenes. Support local comedy and art by coming out to here them tell jokes some time. 

Help us in our mission to eradicate un-ironic selfies! Next time you find yourself in the midst of a fierce nerf gun battle, running with the bulls, or fleeing from the police, snap a selfie; then send it our way.  by sending your Awkward Selfie Submissions to jokermusicblog@gmail.com or tweeting them to @drewjokerIngram with the hash-tag #AwkwardSelfie.